Just know that you are loved, you are important and it is amazing to be queer, as it is a valid identity and many people are. It is very homogeneous/ hetero-normative and being in a catholic institution is not the easiest environment for queer students. 7 years later, I could not be happier, my only regret is I did not talk to someone sooner. They were so accepting and I was one of the lucky queer people that have an accepting family/friend group. That week I told my friends and family I was gay. There was a point where i was looking at the train tracks on the T ride home (waiting for a train to come so I could jump) Thankfully I had a change of heart and now i look back at that day. I internalized everything society told me.
Before I came out I struggled w/ depression and it got to the point where I was going to take my own life, because, quite frankly, I hated myself. I have been out nearly 7 years now (age 16, sophomore year of HS).
See BC resources: bit.ly/BCLGBTQ and area resources: bit.ly/ma-lgbtq There are also Boston area groups if you prefer something off-campus. There are some great BC groups where you can meet supportive peers. People who are questioning their sexual orientation are also welcome. You don’t need to be certain you are gay before talking to someone or attending an LGBTQ+ meeting. There are many people you can safely talk to about your feelings and questions. Maybe some day we’ll have the courage to come out. It’s hard for me because you can’t talk to anyone w/out revealing your secret. But don’t despair- speaking with a BC counselor or a LGBTQ-friendly advisor can help you work through the conflict that you are feeling. states and countries have actually banned conversion therapy. Conversion therapies try to change one’s sexual orientation, but they have not been successful and in fact may be harmful. Scientific research has shown that sexual orientation is not something that can be changed. Idk.I like guys but I don’t want to be gay. Maybe I was experimenting just before foster care and since I ended up loving with only men for so long I got "stuck" in the experimentation phase and now its just what I'm used to. Its heckin confusing! Also I'm totally fine being who I am, I don't feel any guilt or shame for being gay, but growing up in the circumstances I did makes me wonder if I might've been conditioned to like other men vs just naturally liking men. I just wanted to share my experience and my thoughts about my own sexually. I just honestly have no idea why I am the way I am and my childhood might be a logical reason why I prefer men. I also can't say that if I spend the next 20 years living with only women that I'd definitely be more straight. (I actually started looking at gay online sites just before i went into foster care) If Im being honest I can't say if I was born this way or became this way but I do know I don't just willy nilly choose how I feel but it does feel like a swaying spectrum, maybe if I was "changed" by nurture, my tastes can change back and forth over time depending on my environment. I grew up only being attracted to women but eventually grew up since 12 in an all boys school up through 20 in foster care where I started to only think about the other guys. I identify as "very gay" lol I largely am attracted to other men but I also like women just not as often. I do not think its a choice but I think we need more research. If you need help or someone to talk to, try the GLBT Hotline. Taking tasteful nudes and sexy selfies (article) Gay sex FAQs from r/topsandbottoms (article) What you need to know about lube (YT video)
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